Каморка

И снова о колбасе...



отсюда: http://sturman.livejournal.com/294541.html" target="_blank
Там еще много...

CdR писал(а):И снова о колбасе...



отсюда: http://sturman.livejournal.com/294541.html" target="_blank
Там еще много...

"меня колбасит" - последние слова Пятачка на мясокомбинате.

Best Divorce Letter Ever

DEAR WIFE
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.

These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today and that was the last straw.

Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had a new
haircut, had cooked your favourite meal and even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me you love me anymore; you don't want sex or anything that connects us as husband and wife.

Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone.

Your EX-Husband
P.S. Don't try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving away to Spain together! Have a great life!
______________________________________________________________________


Dear Ex-Husband -

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true
that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good man is a far cry from what you've been.

I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining and griping. Too bad that doesn't work.

I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the first thing that came to mind was 'You look just like a girl!' Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I didn't comment.

And when you cooked my favourite meal, you must have gotten me
confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork seven years
ago.

About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the Ј49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed that it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed fifty quid from me that morning.

After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it
out. So when I hit the lotto for ten million pounds, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone.

Everything happens for a reason, I guess.

I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won't get a penny from me. So take care. Signed,

Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell and Free!
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was
born Carl. I hope that's not a problem.

Motivational poster of the day

YOU CAN ONLY DIE ONCE

Fed писал(а):Motivational poster of the day

CdR писал(а):Motivational poster of the day

Vassili писал(а):

CdR писал(а):Motivational poster of the day

Да-да. меня сегодня будут убивать.

Она будет тебя душить

нашел на складе баянов. если вдруг кто-то не видел..



самое интересное дальше...

Gates was denied a visa to enter Nigeria because officials wanted proof that Gates would not live in Nigeria for ever.

надеюсь, это не баян

Гермиона

" target="_blank

Кто потерял?