Свежий прикол

Yury · Сообщение **Yury** » 19 фев 2007, 23:02

vladi M. писал(а):
Yury писал(а):, мой с глумливым взглядом, ...
откуда тока таких словей понабрался

мастера и маргариту в распечатках читал

simon · Сообщение **simon** » 21 фев 2007, 16:39

TOP 10 REASONS MEN PREFER GUNS OVER WOMEN
#10. You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.

#9. You can keep one gun at home and have another for when you're on the
road.

#8. If you admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he will probably let you

try it out a few times.

#7. Your primary gun doesn't mind if you keep another gun for a backup.

#6. Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

#5. A gun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

#4. Guns function normally every day of the month.

#3. A gun doesn't ask, "Do these new grips make me look fat?"

#2. A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

And the number one reason a gun is favored over a woman....

#1. You can buy a silencer for a gun.

simon · Сообщение **simon** » 21 фев 2007, 16:41

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:

* 40-ish.............................49.

* Adventurous................Slept with everyone.

* Athletic........................No breasts.

* Average looking.....................Moooo.

* beautiful..........................Pathological liar.

* Emotionally Secure................On medication.

* Feminist............................Fat.

* Free Spirit..........................Junkie.

* Friendship first.......................Former Slut.

* New-Age..................Body hair in the wrong places.

* Old-fashioned.................No B.J.'s

* Open-minded.........................Desperate.

* Outgoing.............................Loud and embarrassing.

* Professional...........................Witch.

* Voluptuous...........................Very fat.

* Large frame........................Hugely fat.

* Wants soul mate.....................Stalker.

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
* Yes...................................No

* No..................................Yes

* Maybe...............................No

* We need............................I want

* I am sorry...........................You'll be sorry

* We need to talk..............You're in trouble

* Sure, go ahead..................You better not

* Do what you want............You will pay for this later

* I am not upset.....................Of course, I am upset, you moron!

* You're attentive tonight............Is sex all you ever think about?
-
DICTIONARY FOR DECODING MEN'S ENGLISH:
* I am hungry.....................I am hungry

* I am sleepy......................I am sleepy

* I am tired.........................I am tired

* Nice dress.....................Nice cleavage!

* I love you........................Let's have sex now

* I am bored.......................Do you want to have sex?

* May I have this dance?...............I'd like to have sex with you.

* Can I call you sometime?...........I'd like to have sex with you.

* Do you want to go to a movie?......I'd like to have sex with you.

* Can I take you out to dinner?........I'd like to have sex with you.

lostrider · Сообщение **lostrider** » 21 фев 2007, 18:36

Now I know what copycats are -these are copy-paste personalities...

Аман Ванкуверский

Вот бы канадские лендлорды так письма писали

CdR · Сообщение **CdR** » 25 фев 2007, 20:38

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4aJkbBVu3BA

РЫДАЛЪ!

ajkj3em · Сообщение **ajkj3em** » 25 фев 2007, 22:00

Blin. Lego rulit.

Toilet Paper Folder & Dispenser Prototype

mamida · Сообщение **mamida** » 27 фев 2007, 05:22

http://www.zatup.ru/blog/Flux/1983

зверство какое! Котяра если не инфаркт, то импотенцию точно заработал.

CdR · Сообщение **CdR** » 27 фев 2007, 08:43

http://v-alksnis2.livejournal.com/
http://leteha.livejournal.com/399174.html

История замечательная сама по себе.

Kiseta · Сообщение **Kiseta** » 27 фев 2007, 09:36

вот такое тут прислали:

Классификация водки в стиле IT:

0.1л - demo.

0.25л - trial version.

0.5л - personal edition.

0.7л - professional edition.

1.0л - network edition.

1.75л - enterprise.

3л - for small business.

5л - corporate edition.

Бутыль самогона - home edition.

"На посошок" - Service pack.

Рассол с утра - Recovery tool.

Закуска - plugins.

Пиво - patch.

coca-cola, fanta, 7-UP - trojan

tiasur · Сообщение **tiasur** » 27 фев 2007, 19:53

Вряд ли это в приколы, но все равно...
А если бы она шла одна, как бы все получилось?
http://www.youtube.com/v/91jfLK-u1so

Gatchinskiy · Сообщение **Gatchinskiy** » 27 фев 2007, 23:24

“Свидетели Иеговы” стали свидетелями ДТП. Теперь ребятам предстоит непростой выбор: так же остаться свидетелями Иеговы или стать свидетелями ДТП.

sobomax · Сообщение **sobomax** » 28 фев 2007, 10:16

Drive-in:

-Maxim

CdR · Сообщение **CdR** » 28 фев 2007, 10:24

sobomax писал(а):Drive-in:http://englishrussia.com/images/drive_in.jpg

Лучше так: http://englishrussia.com/?p=725
Каменты рулят

Tushkan · Сообщение **Tushkan** » 28 фев 2007, 19:54

не так чтобы прикол, но тексты улыбнули

http://www.shaov.net/texts/Vyberi-menja.htm

http://www.shaov.net/texts/I-na-solnce- ... pjatna.htm