Притча о умном мальчике.
Один мальчик пас овец в горах. Вроде и отличник в школе, и начитан, но пас овец. Потому что отец его пас овец, дед пас овец, прадед пас овец и вообще – марш пасти овец и никаких разговоров. А, поскольку мальчик был начитан и хотелось ему общения, а с овцами не очень-то и поговоришь, каждый день, в полтретьего мальчик начинал истерично кричать:
- Волк!!! Волк!!!
Горцы в ауле начинали ворчать:
- Опять он кричит! Нет же волка никакого!
- А вдруг есть?
- Уже пятый месяц, каждый день нет волка, а тут вдруг появится? Нету там волка.
- Да идите и посмотрите!!! – кричали им женщины.
- Молчи женщина!! Нету волка – на что там смотреть?
- А здесь тебе на что смотреть, джигит? – резонно возражали женщины.
И джигиты шли в горы к отаре и разговаривали с мальчиком. Мальчик быстро отходил от побоев и кричал джигитам вслед:
- Завтра в полтретьего, уважаемые!!
И продолжалась эта идиллия до тех пор пока действительно не пришел Волк. Огромный, страшный зверь. Но умный мальчик не растерялся и закричал:
- Студентки-туристки из медицинского училища!!!! 70 девушек становятся лагерем!!!
И джигиты аула оказались у отары в десять раз быстрее, чем при криках «Волк, волк». Женщины джигитов «Ваймэ!» не успели прокричать, а джигиты были одеты в самые новые спортивные костюмы и у отары уже. С кинжалами, разумеется. Потому что джигит с кинжалом – это красивый понт. Ни одна студентка-медичка не устоит. Тут-то и пришел капец Волку. А мальчика все-равно побили. Уж слишком подлым был обман.
Притча о умном мальчике.
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Gaziz
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LeeVan
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Re: Притча о умном мальчике.
я бы вообще убил.Gaziz писал(а): А мальчика все-равно побили. Уж слишком подлым был обман.
Падлец. Падонак.
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Don Horse
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Вернемся к нашим баранам...
Counting Sheep
A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the shepherd: "If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your flock, will you give me one?"
The shepherd looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing flock and calmly answers: "Sure. Why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his AT&T cell phone, surfs to a NASA page on the internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. Then the young man opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on
his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored.
He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex formulas. He uploads all of this data via an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-colour, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the shepherd and says: "You have exactly 1586 sheep."
"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my sheep" says the shepherd. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then the shepherd says to the young man: "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my sheep?"
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"
"You're a consultant." says the shepherd.
"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
"No guessing required." answered the shepherd. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew; to a question I never asked; and you don't know crap about my business. Now give me back my dog.
A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the shepherd: "If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your flock, will you give me one?"
The shepherd looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing flock and calmly answers: "Sure. Why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his AT&T cell phone, surfs to a NASA page on the internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. Then the young man opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on
his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored.
He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex formulas. He uploads all of this data via an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-colour, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the shepherd and says: "You have exactly 1586 sheep."
"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my sheep" says the shepherd. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then the shepherd says to the young man: "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my sheep?"
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"
"You're a consultant." says the shepherd.
"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
"No guessing required." answered the shepherd. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew; to a question I never asked; and you don't know crap about my business. Now give me back my dog.
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Проф. Преображенский
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oblom
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